Thursday, 10 November 2011

Not my God!!!

Since my blog is all about the big and small incidents in my life that awakened my Spiritual awareness, this incident was very important , it was my first step in understanding my relationship with God.

Most Hindu's will be aware of the "Satya Narayan Katha", this narrative about the devotee of Lord Satya Narayan is heard every full moon, usually accompanied with rituals. In my home every full moon, holiday or not I was dragged out of bed, to listen to this story from an audio cassette along with my parents. For years in my half asleep state I heard but not listened to the audio tape. However one morning I was actually paying attention. The more I listened the more upset I got. Here i was supposed to be listening to something a kin to a sermon, hear the glories of a God, yet all I heard was how people died, lost their fortunes, their children, their kingdom all because they either forgot to or arrogantly refused to take the "prasad" holy offering to the Lord.

My young mind got confused. But what about the God? Where was he in the narrative. What did he do? If he's God he couldn't be petty and egoistic that he gets upset and throws a tantrum every time a devotee misses out on consuming the offering made to him (Lord Satya Narayan)... I was completely baffled my the end of the tape . I had not heard one good thing about the God. All I heard was the fear of him being struck into people " consume or else, worship or else, make an offering or else", No way could a God, any form of God , in any manner of understanding be this. I told my parents I did not want to participate in this full moon prayer service anymore. I mother got extremely upset. I have been very devotional since a young age, my father however patiently asked me why and I explained as best as I could....I said..

" This is not my God, he is not small and petty like human being, my God does not get angry like people over small matters and hold grudges, then he is no God at all!!! My God is all loving, kind, forgiving, he loves you no matter how you are. I worship him who shows me the way not one who teaches me to make others afraid, who is conceited enough to destroy the whole family just because one did not eat the offering made to him. Even if he was to show you the path, it would be loving, not in an intimidating or threatening manner"

Since then i was never compelled to listen to those tales. I would join towards the end for the hymns and happily dig into the tasty offerings sweet and savory...

I was not a student of meta physics then, I had not yet started my studies of various religions. Yet how true that moment of clarity was. God, our original creator who is only pure form of love, I chose to worship the formless super conscious, the energy called love . I today believe in all religions equally, I love all festivals equally. I visit churches, dargahs, temples and even Mosques when ever I can. Today I've written a book on Meta physics, that journey started with this simple sentence.... "This is not my God!!!"

1 comment:

  1. When MOSES came down with the tablets of ten commandments, there was no mention of the consequences if the laws were not obeyed ... this fear psychosis is the doings of the interpreters of the word of god ... its so aptly portrayed in the passage above that the all mighty who created every thing in and around us is not someone to be feared, but a deep belief and understanding will fuel our conscience towards a wholesome life and world. its true that there are 7 billion ways to discover and interpret god and no ritual or book can bind or dictate laws towards oneness :)