Friday, 25 November 2011

Sex Makes you happiest....

Today in our daily tabloid there was an article "Sex makes you happiest", I started to think about what was said. To be fair, most of us will agree , this in fact is pretty true. Good sex,  makes one feel attractive, loved, compatible. It leaves one glowing, gets rid of negative energies.I feel couples who have regular good sex stay together longer even if a lot of things go wrong in their lives.

There was a time not too long back, I assumed good sex meant a good relationship. I was in a live in relationship. We both couldn't keep our hands off each other. We laughed a lot, talked a lot and made love a lot. I assumed ( mistakenly) this was a relationship for keeps.  We were together for three years. Most parts are as beautiful as can be. I have some of my best memories of my time with him.

Yet... the lack of commitment, not knowing if we were together or not or when he'll decide to take a break was excruciating to say the least on my nerves.  It was sheer nerve wrecking to live at the edge all the time. No just sex does not give you happiness.The happiness I felt with "him" was as temporary as a high you get after doping and then you come crashing down. The lows are the worst one can imagine. We were constantly on and off, there were too many break ups. There was no assurance whether " He " would turn up or not, so I couldn't make plans to go out with friends. I would spend evening alone ,just waiting and cry myself to sleep. I waited for him on my birthday. I wished he'd get me a gift... Sex in a no strings relationship gets you happiness no doubt. This happiness is just as temporary.

For Happiness to be long term and a constant state of your being, it comes as a result of a lot of little things falling in place. Sex is a huge factor but equally important is knowing you have someone you can come back home too. Happiness happens when you can say to no to sex if you're too tired or just want to talk that night, and have assurance he won't dump you. happiness comes when you can have implicit faith in someone being around through good times and bad, through sickness and in health.

Great sex didn't bring me happiness because days when I was unwell , he was partying with friends, when I was low he'd make the excuse of his parents and leave. There was no happiness because there were no spontaneous gifts, no spontaneous outings, I don't remember if he even paid his bills ever. There was no happiness because I didn't feel cared for, I wasn't secure. 

Sex makes one happy when there is love involved, especially in a committed relationship. The love is what makes your cheeks glow, its love that releases the happy hormones. It is love that boosts your immunity and helps you sleep better,it is love that keeps couple together and its love that makes sex better....
Sex makes you Happiest... I thought so too, now I know better.....


  1. nice! but totally from a woman's perspective!

  2. this passage , in my view has a very clear stand point; that though sex is a very physical act , it does not stay so in when humans do it , it becomes a matter of the heart and state of mind . the writer has very eloquently and clearly put it across ... though a woman's perspective it is very articulate ... :)

  3. Nice post ....can totally relate to it :)